Last week Kenny Conley wrote a series of posts about Parent/Child Dedications. You should check out what he wrote he’s got some great thoughts.
Here’s part of my response to his post.
First let me say that I have wonderful staff. Patti Jo Mackey and Jenni Bowman are the main reasons our dedications are successful. Here’s what they do. About a month before dedication we have a dedication class for parents. This class is required and I think it is the most essential ingredient in our process. At the class Patti Jo helps families understand the significance and meaning of dedication as well as helping them lay a strong spiritual foundation for their kids. Also in the class we introduce several elements that we will use in the dedication. We have parents choose a life verse and dedication sponsors for their child (just someone who is important to the family and commits to pray for the child). We also give them a template to write a letter to their child.
We hold our dedication as a special service on Sunday afternoon where participants can invite their family and friends. We have special music, I present a brief challenge to parents then we have the families come up. Rather than just a cattle call we have families come up one at a time with their sponsors. Their sponsors read the child’s life verse then the parents read a portion of the letter they have written to the child. (If they can without crying. Some have their sponsor read the letter.) After each family has been introduced and read their letter, we close with vows from the parents and the audience, and I pray over the families. After the service we have a photographer and a nice reception.
This format is great for us. We have time to build into families. It’s personal and meaningful, mainly because families have put thought into what their doing and they come prepared. This format is also practical. We’ve had dedications with as many as 20 children and the service lasts a little less than an hour.
Here are a few things about our dedication I wanted to highlight:
Parent Class
Let me say again, the dedication class is the key to a successful Parent/Child Dedication. It’s also one of the best opportunities you’ll ever have to build into the lives of parents. Parents are highly motivated when their children are young. You’ll have a much higher percentage of parents attend a dedication class than you will most other forms of parent classes. If you want minister to parents you’ve got to bring you “A” game to the dedication class.
Dedication Letter
One of the best elements in our dedications is the parent letter. I learned this from Walter Draughon, a pastor I served with at FBC in St. Petersburg Florida. As part of his wedding services he had the couple write letters to one another and then he used those letters in the service. He brought the same concept to the Parent/Child Dedication. Walter introduced me to this idea and I’ve been using it ever since. When my daughter was dedicated my wife and I both wrote a letter for her dedication, and for us, it was the most special and personal part of the dedication. I can’t tell you how many families feel the same way. At Brookwood, it’s been a key to help make our dedications personal instead of a just being a “dog and pony” show. Nothing expresses the spirit of child dedication better than the parents’ own words. Plus, after the dedication, parents have a tangible and poignant reminder of the commitment they made that they can share with their kids for years to come.
Dedication Book
In preparation for the dedication we ask parents to: provide a picture of their child and a family picture, chose a life verse for their child, select dedication sponsors and write a letter to their child. It’s a lot to do but the parents’ preparation for the dedication is one of the most important ingredients in making the dedication significant. To help parents prepare, we created a dedication book that’s kind of like a memory book. We give parents the book during the dedication class and it walks them through dedication preparation. The book has a duel benefit. It’s a great keepsake for parents and it’s great for helping us get all the info and elements we need for the dedication in a timelier manner. Here’s a .pdf of the dedication book if you’re interested.
Hope this has been helpful for you and thanks again to Kenny for opening the dialog.
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Ned, this is freaking awesome! I love it… and I LOVE the dedication book. I hope you know I’m totally going to steal this… nothing new under the sun, huh? You know, I do a lot of weddings, I’m going to steal the idea of reading the letters to one another as well. I really like that. Ned, it sounds like you guys have created a powerful experience here. I think this is what every Children’s/Family pastor show be challenged to do. How do you create powerful experienced around their family and faith. I think that when we do this, we’re leading in the right direction.
There may be a few things I’m going to have to tweak to work at Gateway, but this is BEAUTIFUL! I may be calling you in a few days to get some nitty gritty details. I’m concluding my series on child dedication on Wednesday and I’ll be linking over to this post in a big way.
Ned, I completely agree! This is awesome! We have dedicated 3 of our 4 so far and I would completely love to be a part of a dedication service like yours! With our first two we were able to dedicate them in a very special service at Morrow. We were able to pick out a special song and verse and then Mike invited people to come down and pray over us and our family. It was so very special to us. Being a small church we were able to do it this way. When we came to a larger church for our 3rd child it was just as you stated “the Cattle call”. I think it is so much more meaningful for the parents when they have to do a little of the work and are more involved in choosing part of the service for their child. I really do enjoy reading your fresh take on things and being able to steal it from you! lol
You are a Child Dedication Rock Star! Great stuffs..
All of this is EXACTLY the direction we are going at LifeChurch.tv. Child Dedications has been the “dog and pony” show. What we know is that people want meaningful experiences and what they (we-I’m a parent too) NEED is to be led and equipped to spiritually lead their children! This is one little yet significant piece of that. I love having parents write down things like the dedication sponsors and the letter. I know there are stats out there about how things have life after we’ve spoken them and written them down. It brings a different level of commitment and expectation. This is all awesome. Rock on!
I love the intentional process you take the parents through with the Dedication Book. Thank you for sharing. Keep it coming!
Thanks for sharing. We are working through our dedication process right now and I love this stuff. Great job and thanks for sharing with the Kingdom!
I am working with our Children’s Pastor to redesign the Baby Dedication at our church and was searching the web and found this site. Thanks. The Dedication Book is very unique and usable. I love keepsakes and will share with the pastor. Prayerfully, he will agree.